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FUNNY HA-HA COMIN’ UP

So now I’ve got the poop on the upcoming reading at Chicago’s Hideout, one of the coolest bars in the Western Hemisphere. On Wednesday, August 10, from 8-10 pm, the line-up will be:

• Syndicated columnist Mark Bazer
• Amy Krouse Rosenthal, author of “Encyclopedia of an Ordinary Life”
• John Green, author of “Looking for Alaska”
• Leonard Pierce of UR Chicago
• The funny folks of Schadenfreude!
• A film by Steve DeLaHoyde
• And Claire Zulkey of Zulkey.com, who organized the whole megillah.

I’d put in links for everyone, but I’m lazy and am working on a dialup anyway.

For more info, check out:

http://www.zulkey.com/events.html

http://www.hideoutchicago.com

Be there or be slowly roasted on a spit by your own personal demons.

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READING AT “FUNNY HA-HA” AUGUST 11

The inimitable Claire Zulkey of Zulkey.com has invited yours truly to participate in a humorous reading at the Hideout, the coolest bar in Chicago. Check out her website for more information about other performers as the date nears. Last time I was there, the readers included Amy Krouse Rosenthal and Wendy McClure, author of the literary hoot, I’m Not The New Me. My personal favorite was a hilarious video of the effects of driving from Chicago to Des Moines (a six-hour trip) with the only song on your stereo being ABBA’s “Dancing Queen.” Come on down to the party. The Hideout is secreted at 1354 W. Wabansia in Chicago.

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THE BRASS RAT

One day a man shopping in an antique store found an intriguing curio of a small, brass figure of a rat. He liked the geegaw so much that he took it to the store owner and inquired about the price.

“Ah,” said the owner mysteriously. “The rat will cost you $10, but the story behind the rat will cost you another $90.”

“Keep the story,” said man, “I just want the rat.” He handed over his $10 and went on his way.

As the man walked down the street with his new brass rat, he began to notice he was being followed. From out of doorways and up from sewer grates came real live rats. As he walked, he attracted more and more. Soon a hundred or more rats were at his heels. The man broke into a trot to get away from the vermin, but the swarm only grew larger. He ran and ran, but couldn’t escape them.

Finally, he ran up a bridge over the river in town and threw his brass rat into the water. From some unknown reason, all the live rats followed the brass rat, threw themselves into the river, and drowned.

Shaken and confused, the man walked back to the antique shop. “Well now,” said the owner, “are you ready to hear the story behind the brass rat?”

“The hell with your story,” the man said. “I just want to know where I can buy a brass Republican.”