Category: Monkeys

It’s here it’s here it’s finally HERE!!!!!

Quit your job!
Take off your pants!
Swing from the rafters!
Dress like a cowboy and ride a dog!
Fling some poop!

IT’S NATIONAL MONKEY DAY!!!!!

Tease a fundamentalist!
Go see King Kong!
Order a Monkey Phone Call for your friends!
Masturbate like you mean it!
Buy a million typewriters and call a million of your monkey friends and type the complete works of Shakespeare!
Evolve, for God’s sake!

IT’S NATIONAL MONKEY DAY!!!!!

Image from the Taipei Times.

Hope your shopping is all done…..

Amaze friends and guests with this lifesize and incredibly lifelike robotic animatronic chimpanzee!

We live in strange and miraculous times.

Then look no further than eBay, where a pair of authentic pants worn by cosmomonkeys in the Soviet space program. Buy them. You know you want them.

Keith Olbermann on MSNBC takes on the thankless task of listing the top ten monkeys in American culture. Talk about a contentious topic for the water cooler!

I’m glad he stuck his neck out and voiced his opinion, but among all the important simians he omitted perhaps the best use of monkeys on television ever, “Lancelot Link, Secret Chimp.” I hope the list will be revised soon, possibly eliminating that hack Bonzo–he rode Reagan’s coattails for his entire career.

And let’s not forget Lancelot’s side project, the proto-simian garage band the Evolution Revolution. (Oh, longing for the days when that kind of title was merely a joke and not a politicaly rallying cry.) Perhaps my affection stems from the way my dad, years earlier, used to mock rock and roll on the radio as “monkey music.” Who knows? Who cares? Rock on, Lancelot!